Tag Archive | psychology

“BEING ME”

Yesterday I attended the “Being Me, Me Myself & Allah” conference in Kensington; at first I was a bit hesitant about going because I know my kids get restless too quickly and that I get agitated when they do; but now I’m glad I did because I learnt so much mashallah!

The conference started from 10 and finished at 6 but we only stayed until 3 so I missed some of the talks but heard the ones I felt most relevant to me.  This is a write-up of the notes I made from the conference especially for those sisters who could not attend, in the hope that they too, may benefit from the knowledge of what was said.

The first speaker to kick off the conference was Ustadh Musleh Khan, his bio reads as follows: Musleh Khan was born in Madinah, Saudi Arabia.  In 2002 ustadh Musleh was accepted at the Islamic University of Madinah where he completed a diploma in Arabic followed by a BA in Islamic Law from the faculty of Da’wah and Usul al-din.  Ustadh Musleh has been counselling and offering spiritual support to sisters for almost10 years.  He has conducted several sisters only classes/intensive courses on several topics including: The Complete Muslimah, A Muslimah & her husband, and Women & politics.

The talk was entitled: Finding true happiness and the notes were as follows: Continue reading

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Drowning

I feel, right now, like I’m drowning.  I feel like I’m being pulled under by a huge tidal wave and I’m powerless to escape, leaving me to watch my downfall through horrified eyes.  I wonder why no-one else can see it in my eyes, the panic and fear – the breakdown that feels imminent.  Is it normal to feel this way so often?  To always feel like at any moment the mask of sanity might slip leaving your real face exposed?  What would the whispering voices say then, if I simply let it out and screamed loudly never stopping until I had no voice left with which to vocalise my pain and loneliness?  I see nothing in my eyes, they look dead to me, is this too, normal?  Peering into myself, trying to recognise who looks back at me, trying to regain some sense of familiarity with myself but seeing nothing but blackness and dread.  I had a nightmare once about dead boys, their eyes were dead, you could see the life had been sucked out of their eyes and they looked ahead blankly – buttons shiny and black instead of eyes, that’s how I see my own eyes.  Should that scare me? Continue reading