Baby blues

It is 2004 and I am not a single mum, yet…
However, I am a new mother to a baby girl who is 9 weeks old mashallah but who I feel is a stranger to me and who I feel doesn’t like me and whose needs I cannot meet. I feel like I can identify with single mothers because I am in a new area, alone and depressed with no-one to confide in, struggling to cope. Is this really my life?

I have no friends in my area and have no experience of babies so I feel overwhelmed as to how I should behave and even talk to a baby. The midwives at the hospital taught me nothing of how to change let alone bathe a baby and I didn’t know to ask either as naive as it sounds. My family rarely visit as everyone is busy at work and I don’t confide in them because I have a reputation for being “tough” which simply translates as: I keep to myself. Continue reading